The Silver Bot

The man plopped down on his chair, defeated.

His father’s maxims bit his ears and nagged him like tired Christmas jingles.

“No pain, no gain. No guts, no glory. No risk no reward. Gotta’ pay to play. You never know until you try.”

On and on.

He sat, dazed, in a semi-trance, half-comatose, half numb, with tinges of remorse and disappointment punctuated by an occasional anxiety spike.

He couldn’t believe Dad had been gone almost five years.

It seemed like yesterday that they would gather on the back porch to celebrate the victories, cry over the defeats and laugh about both.

Dad always delivered the perfect line, the stern encouragement, the voice of wisdom that transcended the man’s annoyance over the unflappable demeanor that smiled regardless, win or lose, rain or shine, day or night.

“I’ll have to face this one alone,” he thought, smitten with a mix of terror and sadness.

As if he knew how.

A familiar paralysis crept over him like a slow-moving shadow, unobserved, adding darkness in tiny, imperceptible stages until it blocked all light, held him bound to his history, prisoner of his doubt.

His eyes drooped, his hands fell limp, his neck crooned forward, listless and heavy.

“YOU’RE JUST AFRAID,” the voice bellowed in his head. “IT’S NOT REAL,” it continued, “never is, never was. You know better.”

Startled awake, the man let his suppressed smile come through.

“Yeah, Dad,” he reflected, “I remember. Nothing to fear but the fear itself. Easy to say, not so easy to doespecially after having your butt handed to you on a platteragain.”

Still, the grin lingered, chased out some of the cobwebs.

“Funny how fear works,” the man mused, drawing on memories. “Freezes us into inaction, negates powerful lessons, shuts down our creative juice.”

All these and more, he had bantered at length on the porch over …unsweetened ice tea and fat, salted Heinz pretzels in a big brown box.

He wished he had one now.

“Failures come and gopart of life,” Dad preached. “Same as triumphs. Not the failure that sets you back, son, only the fear of failure.”

The man struggled to apply the notion to today, beaten once more, beaten and tired, a space where the desire to quit and pack it in held court in full regalia, so many jesters and wannabes heckling their own loserisms, taunts and jeers.

“Told you soshould have listenedbail while you still canget a real jobnyah, nyah, nyah, nyah…”

“Only the FEAR of failure…”

Dad’s mandate.

“That’s all it is.” The man wrestled in his mind. “I have failed many times and so what. I might succeed on the next one. Failure’s not so bad, unless it traps me into never starting over.”

The man looked around the room, as if to conjure the image of his father, an involuntary shudder rippling down his spine.

“I know, I know,” he spoke out loud. “Sometimes it just takes me a minute.”

He pushed himself erect, picked up his chin and settled his gaze on the picture on the mantelpiece.

“I know,” he repeated. “I know.”

That’s A View From The Ridge…

About The Author

Author Ridgely Goldsborough invites you to subscribe to The Daily Column, a heart-felt collection of stories that inspire hope and courage. Please do so at www.aviewfromtheridge.com.

ridge@aviewfromtheridge.com

Chamonix Mont Blanc is a stunning destination with the towering Monte Bianco and majestic glaciers. Most of us like to go parapenting or from time to time visiting the Aiguille du Midi. I usually get a flight from Weston and stay at a Chamonix guesthouse during my vacation.

We previously stayed in Best Western Brownsboro-Louisville East however it never matched its description: The Best Western Brownsboro Inn sits just off Interstate 264 in Louisville, KY. The property is 10 miles from Louisville International Airport, and shuttle service is available. Downtown Louisville is just five miles away, and a variety of golf courses, shopping and restaurants are also nearby. The Best Western Brownsboro Inn offers a two-level courtyard setting with a gazebo and a indoor pool. Complimentary amenities include continental breakfasts, an airport shuttle and newspapers in the lobby. A fitness room is also on site. Business center amenities include complimentary wireless Internet access. The hotel also offers a 24-hour front desk. The hotel lounge offers live entertainment on select evenings.

In comparison in Chamonix Haute Savoie the luxury chalet is always excellent. Also dining out in our groups number one restaurant, Big Boy Family Restaurant, eating diabetic low fat tortilla chips is a real treat. Chamonix France is a large enough destination to make sure that there is lots of things for the tourist to do. With a cross country skiing track and a range of terraced caf©s, Chamonix provides a choice of skiing, French charm and tourist attractions which few French ski resorts can beat.

Direct Answers - Column for the week of November 11, 2002

I just started a wonderful new job. The atmosphere is laid-back, and the people alone make the place fantastic. The best of them all is my boss. She is 29, a month my elder, and very comely in appearance.

At first I was merely attracted to her, but as time went on, I fell hard. I couldn’t put my finger on it, but she has such a sweet and gentle spirit. Problem is she’s not only my boss. She’s married.

At weekly meetings, I didn’t want them to end. I’d lose focus during the conversation. I’d stare at her when she was talking. She is such a delightful and special person I couldn’t help it. I wished I could be with her all day.

On some occasions, I thought she had to know this. It was killing me inside. She’d walk by me in a sundress, and I’d look her over. I would notice her looking down at me coyishly, then she’d get a call from her husband and be all happy to hear from him. I cut my eyes back to my computer, upset.

I thought I had to tell her, so one Friday, I did. She told me everything I needed to hear. She said she was happily married. I said I wouldn’t hurt her in her career. She told me to get over it. I told her it was done, but that I love her in a way that makes me want to do the best for her.

I want to be there for her, but now she’s very cold to me. I say hello in the hallway and she walks by me quicker. Her actions appear scripted. It sears my soul every day to think I hurt or scared her in any way. Will things return to normal so we can be close friends in spite of all this?

Reynold

Reynold, you will never be close friends because friends is not what you want from her. She gave you no opening for your remarks. You created a problem for her with a subordinate, a problem with no easy solution except to keep you at arm’s length.

You created a permanent difficulty in your new job, one which can influence your chances for raises and promotion. The only solution is to keep your eyes and your thoughts to yourself and do your job.

You are looking at this strictly from your own point of view. Where did you get the idea you can tell any married woman you are romantically and sexually attracted to her? That would mean, when you marry, any man is free to hit on your wife.

When crossing the street, it is best to look both ways. If you think only of your own objective, the opposite curb, you are likely to get run over.

Wayne & Tamara

Failed Strategy

In April I cheated on my husband and let him find out. I swore to him it was over and wouldn’t happen again, but I’ve been stringing along the guy I cheated with, telling him I love him and keeping him in the background just in case things didn’t get better with my husband.

Well, my husband found out and now wants a divorce. I don’t. I can’t see myself without him. I am scared this time I will lose him for good.

Angel

Angel, your letter reminds us of the Aesop’s fable about the dog carrying a chunk of meat in his mouth. When he looked into the water, he saw another dog with a larger piece of meat. In grabbing for it the dog lost both pieces, the real and the imaginary.

Your backup plan was your undoing. It proved to your husband why second chances are often unwarranted. Do you understand the moral of the story? Greediness can cause us to lose everything.

Wayne & Tamara

About The Author

Authors and columnists Wayne and Tamara Mitchell can be reached at www.WayneAndTamara.com.

Send letters to: Direct Answers, PO Box 964, Springfield, MO 65801 or email: DirectAnswers@WayneAndTamara.com.

When all that you have done has not brought you what you truly desire, isn’t it about time to move out of the box ask questions and make changes?

What would you think if you went to your doctor and he hit you over the head with a rubber hammer to knock you out before some minor surgery? Does the horse and buggy now serve you to take you to work each day? Would you settle for going down town to the telegraph office, to have a message sent to your aunt across the country? Could you possibly get along without your cel phone, fax machine or microwave oven?

The answer is “of course not.” We have evolved and our world is moving much too quickly to rely on out dated technology to serve us. At some point in our lives we look at our situation and re-evaluate what works and does not work for us. Our old Commodore 286 computer could not handle today’s demands for speed and reliability and we would consider it insanity for any company to rely on this technology.

Our truth is as fluid as the water that covers the planet, and it changes everyday as we re-evaluate and recreate the circumstances of our lives. Mankind has learned to adapt to the changing circumstances and how react to them. Most of the time we can plainly see what works and does not work in our lives, and yet there is one area where we are plainly stuck in the box, where we consciously ignore the obvious and put blind faith into something that has never worked. We are so highly motivated by fear in this area of consciousness that we most often turn our thoughts away from it, and hope that it will all work itself out in the end.

From the time we were born we assumed our parent’s morality, ethics and believe systems. After years of trying to get our own way, we gave into what we thought our parents, our siblings, our community and religion wanted from us, or we were in conflict with them.

Many of us who were brought up in the churches caved into their doctrine. We once again ignored the obvious, and the early training at home left us with little resistance for the religious leaders that would teach us to follow blindly, with little to show but promises of something greater to come in the future, and eternal damnation if we did not comply.

We did not understand why the promise of peace on earth and abundance was not happening in our lives, why praying didn’t get us what we wanted and were we wanted to go. Yet we could not reject or question the doctrine and even in as much as we intuitively knew that we were been giving a line of BS, we wouldn’t dare call it that, just in case there might really be some truth to it, in case we would be punished. So great is the fear that we have blinded ourselves to the obvious fact that what they taught us did not bring what they promised.

We have grown up, we have evolved and we have moved on. However we still carry the burden of outdated, archaic belief systems that are holding us back. Old values are just that, they are old and do not work in a modern society. God (creator) is life; life and God are two words that are interchangeable. Life moves on and is constantly changing. Now substitute the word life for God in the last sentence and see how that works. Everything in the system is moving except for our thoughts about what we were taught to believe. We know it doesn’t work, still we push those thoughts away less we be damned for even thinking them. Blind faith has never worked; it just allows you to give into the status quo and move around the questions gracefully and remain relatively safe.

In order for spirituality to work in this century and the next, we must change our thoughts about what we have been taught in the past. We must question what we observe that does not work and make modifications and changes that better reflect our new awareness and enlightenment. Life (God) changes and so must we. We must embrace a new concept of whom and what the creator is. We must give way to the fact that God is not a vengeful, warring, angry, vindictive God. We must give way to the fact that everything is God, life is God, we are God manifesting in physical form and we are all connected. We must know that God does not punish and hand out everlasting damnation; it is OK to question and change our belief systems. We will not go to hell or heaven; those are only manmade concepts of the afterlife. We do not have to be parented and we are absolutely free to explore our own individual spirituality without retribution from God.

That which created us is that which we know as unconditional love, freedom and life, always changing always moving towards perfection. That which has served us before no longer does (if it ever did?), and by the very nature of what God is, we must change our image of him/her. God is not an anthropomorphic being with physical emotion, and as we are created in his/her image so God must change as we change our image because we are the same.

Man has evolved, has changed but he has left his spiritual awareness at the back door. In order to move to the next step, humanity must once again know itself as spiritual. You can not find God because you already are God. God is the sum of all of its parts. It is life, freedom, choice and unconditional love, it is who we are, and it is our inheritance, God is all around you, everything is God including you. It is the life force that creates all that is. Life creates only life, it does not judge and it has no preferences or needs; its only will is to create more life. Mankind created itself in this form because this is how it saw itself in the physical world.

There are no rules except for natural laws that govern physicality. All physical laws are man’s laws. Man cannot project his laws onto God or into the afterlife; they are valid only in the physical world. God’s laws or commandments are interpretations of what man thought God wanted and there is nothing that God wants as God is all that is and therefore has no wants. God’s laws were a convenience for humanity because it took away the responsibility for man to govern himself, they do not exist. The real power and responsibility for these laws was always with man.

The final frontier will be to explore that which is already known but has been forgotten, that which is in each and everyone of us individually and together, forever connected, separate but never apart. We cannot move forward until we leave the old image of God behind, we cannot evolve spiritually until we know that that the anthropomorphic God no longer exists. The next step is not into outer space but inner space. The final frontier does not take a space ship to get there, it is all about communication and making time to travel inward and it is also the recognition that we are all connected, there is only one God, one life force and we are that which we call God. Man is here to serve no God, but to service life itself.

Roy E. Klienwachter is a resident of British Columbia, Canada. A student of NLP, ordained minister, New Age Light Worker and Teacher. Roy has written and published five books on New Age wisdom. Roy’s books are thought provoking and designed to empower you to take responsibility for your life and what you create. His books and articles are written in the simplicity and eloquence of Zen wisdom.

You may not always agree with what he has to say. You will always come away with a new perspective and your thinking will never be the same.

Roy’s style is honest and comes straight from the heart without all the metaphorical mumble jumble and BS.

Visit Roy at: http://www.klienwachter.com

Consider this. If it is possible to quote you as a person on the Stock Exchange, what would be your real worth?

Have you ever, in your wildest imagination thought that one day, it might just be possible to quote professional men and women, on the Stock Exchange? Never, you say. You in fact think it is just a figment of my imagination.

I agree with you. Getting personally quoted on the Stock Exchange might just be imagination today. But it can be real tomorrow.

Many things we see, live and work with today, were imagination years ago before they became reality. Name them. Space exploration, the internet, the digital camera, and many high tech gadgets. Today, technology has compressed the world into the cell phone in your hands. Those who put their imagination to work years ago are reaping plentiful harvest today irrespective of currency fluctuations and global upheavals of market forces.

So why not take a step of faith today, move ahead of your peers, trust in God who created you with the power of imagination, lean not unto your own understanding and just begin to meditate on this question: “If it is possible for me to be quoted on the Stock Exchange, what would be the real value of my stock?” How will friends, colleagues, the financial press and investors assess me? What is in me that will attract them to invest?
Years ago, the Institute of Chartered Accountants of Nigeria (ICAN) was the only professional body enjoying the chartered status in Nigeria. Today, many professional bodies are seeking that status for their institutes and members.

A chartered status confers maturity, excellence, discipline, integrity, authority, added value and prestige on members. What stops them from seeking public quotation tomorrow and asking members to do same as a way of promoting professionalism and checking quackery? As a professional, what will distinguish you from professional fakes and pirates will go beyond your experience, professional and academic qualifications. It will be the real you that will determine the price of your stock in the Stock Exchange, that is, if you meet the requirements for quotation.

And doing so means submitting yourself and professional calling to the discipline and authority of a regulatory body that will seek personal quotation of professionals in the Stock Exchange.

Think about this. It will lead you to a sober reflection and thorough stock taking about yourself, your products and services, your business and relationships. Forget the amount of money you make and position in your career or corporate ladder. The question again. What is your real worth? No acting, no compromises.

If it is possible to privatize you through an Initial Public Offer of shares, would investors be interested to pick up your stock, believing they will reap dividends of professionalism.

What would be your real worth per share if you are quoted? Are you sure your personal stock will sell up to $1 per share?

Do not beat your chest and quickly claim that your stock will sell more than that because investors will subject you to same considerations and criteria they do for all their investments in the stock market. Are you sure any investor will buy into you because in investment considerations, there are no emotions. Investors are real in their approach. They have real money which they want to put in real persons, real business. And they want real returns, no acting, no stories.

Dear professional, you may be handsome or pretty, very intelligent, very qualified, and well connected.

So what makes you attractive to investors that will enable them to determine your worth, per share?

If I ask you your worth you will probably monetize your personal assets, wealth, qualifications, experience and goodwill and tell me your worth.
But you will hide your liabilities in ethics, character and content. But if I still ask you, “what is your real worth?”, you may hesitate or throw the question back at me: “What do you mean by your real worth?” I will tell you.

Your real worth incorporates what marketing experts call demographics and psychographics. They include age, income, wealth, assets, qualifications, socio economic class, personality, values and others. You know them. But what distinguishes your real worth in my understanding are your ways, integrity, talent, skills, beliefs, ethics, righteousness, character and your relationship with almighty God.

The last three factors are so vital yet so neglected even by stockbrokers and investment analysts. The new challenge is, how can brokers measure these factors? Their eyes and concentration are rigidly fixed on the bottom line, profits, assets and liabilities. All on figures, and Facts behind the figures, and never on the People behind the figures. That is why there is so much crookedness in many business sectors today.

But as business risks increase and global economic turmoil intensifies, soon, and very soon, attention will shift from figures, and the facts behind them, to people. This will herald the listing of professionals on Stock Exchanges worldwide, because the real issues are not figures, but the people behind the figures. So, what is your real worth?

Today, we have the Commodity Stock Exchange. One day, the Human Stock Exchange will come.

Are you prepared? Price, summarizes the value of anything. It measures the worth of any product or service. It can fluctuate, up and down, driven by quality, quantity, availability, and the market forces of demand and supply.

How can I have a price? you ask, I am a human being, good reasoning.
But that was valid years ago, not now. Today, everybody has a price. You have heard it before. But you have never really considered the wisdom of that statement, because you believed it more as a cliché than something real.

You have a price. Not the amount of money with which people can bribe you or buy your conscience. Your price is your real worth which requires plenty of wisdom and common sense to discern. You have often heard men say, “that girl is cheap”. Why do they say that? They are not talking of monetary value. What they mean could be, “that girl” may be easy to manipulate, take advantage of, used, tossed about, easily dazzled with material things and easily deceived with lies. Why then do men say she is cheap?

The girl in question may well be a chartered professional with a string of degrees and professional qualifications, memberships, experience, good pay, drives two cars and lives comfortably in a duplex. Yet she is branded cheap by a man who does not even earn up to a quarter of her income.

So what is the “cheapness”? It has to do with her dignity, self-respect, chastity, values, ways, and strength of character. She must have compromised some or all of these in her relationship with the man.

What could have caused this? Maybe it is because of the forces of demand and supply of husbands in the marriage market.

These forces are vicious, bothering a lot of aging spinsters, forcing them to compromise their values and standards in their desperation to get husbands. There are many aging spinsters in the marriage market today. So many of them And many of them are professionals, well connected, parading intimidating credentials, good income, yet one thing still eludes them, that is to get a husband.

The plight of these professional spinsters is not helped by the paradox in the marriage market.

While the spinsters are increasing in number and are aging, the number of marriageable men is decreasing. At 35, the spinster is really desperate to get married. She falls into the hands of “hit and run” men, full of lies and looking for desperate ladies to panel beat.

To hook her man, our dear spinster lowers her standards, maybe compromises her chastity, and behaves in ways the man considers cheap. She picks all the bills, and even pampers the man, all to get a husband. Yet she is ditched and branded cheap. How painful. If “spinster desperate” was to be quoted on the Stock Exchange, and the run away lover was an investment analyst, how would he value her stock? Would he advise investors to stake their money in this spinster? Spinsters, I ask you, what is your real worth?

The case of this class of spinsters is pathetic. Men touch them and go. They fast and pray, no husbands. Yet some men, who are not even qualified to be next in rank to them in corporate offices, have the temerity to say, “That girl is cheap”. The men take off to marry less “qualified” girls. What does this example tell you? Your real worth goes beyond your qualifications and material resources.

Dear professionals, do a personal audit of your life and your work. Are you real?

What is your relationship with God? If you establish a personal relationship with your creator, and you are real, no matter the odds, then your real worth will appreciate.

But if you begin to act and do it your own way without God, just because you want to get that thing you desire so much, your worth will depreciate.

Eric Okeke, corporate storyteller, motivational speaker, business writer and copy writer. He is one of Nigeria’s most experienced financial journalist. I recommend that you read this valuable book, “How To Tell A Great Story” that is dedicated to teaching people just like you about the famed R.P.I Principle. Go now to http://www.howtotellagreatstory.com

Oh, this is a great topic! I remember when I was younger and in school, fear stopped me from asking out a girl I wanted to date. I can remember all the thoughts of different things I wanted to say and how I would ask her out. But as quickly as the thoughts to ask her out popped in my head, I came up with all the reasons why she might say no. I remember the “feeling” of rejection and embarrassment even though I didn’t even pick up the phone! It’s as real in my mind right now as it was then.

I didn’t understand it then but I certainly do today.

Do you ever have any thoughts of fear that cause you to not to move ahead with any of your dreams or goals?

Every human on earth at one time or another feels this “fear” and reverts back into their “safety” or comfort zone. The system was created to protect us in times of real danger but we must learn when danger is real or caused by our imagination of what may happen…again.

What ability causes one person to face and overcome possible rejection at work, in school or in a relationship? On the other hand what causes someone to be paralyzed by a mere thought? Consider the following:

• A man who goes after business like a tiger may be uncomfortable with women and therefore not be able to approach a woman for fear of rejection.

• A woman who is miserable in a relationship may be petrified at the thought of saying anything to her spouse in fear of the potential discussion or backlash.

• A child may not seek out other children to play with at school in fear of rejection.

The list can go on and on, from fear of leaving your job, to fear of hurting yourself if you try something new. So, what is really going on, and how can we stop this once and for all?

First and foremost, understand that fear is a very common feeling and we all have one fear or another. The “feeling” of fear is almost solely based on what we think may happen if we try and fail. It is different than actually knowing that we will hurt ourselves if we fall 20 stories from a building.

Most fears are illusions we create in our own head, based on past conditioning and not based on what is possible. As children we are natural born risk takers and for the most part we are fearless. The meaning we give an experiences when we do not achieve the result we want, determines how we “see” and “feel” the next opportunity that seems like the one we’ve experienced in the past.

If we experience rejection more times than we care to, we tend to mentally label the experience a negative one. Over time, this becomes our belief, and our beliefs, as you already know, becomes our reality.

But…:

• What would happen if we changed the meaning of an experience we didn’t like?

• What if we learned to label the experience a learning one or an interesting one?

• Do you think your tolerance level would increase for trying again?

I have learned that people who really succeed in various areas of life often frame their experiences differently than those who quickly label the experience as a negative one.

When we feel fear, we are playing a mental track that is not conducive to growth. All growth comes from stretching oneself past the comfort zone that limits us. Risk is a necessary part of the reward. You cannot have one without the other.

Let me suggest that you start to label your experiences in a way that serves you rather than limits you.

We have very few limits except the ones that we set on ourselves. And those are mostly out of fear from the past. Do not let your past control your present thinking. Step out and grow. Step out of your comfort zone and be free again!

–

You have permission to publish this article electronically or in print, free of charge, as long as the bylines are included. A courtesy copy of your publication would be appreciated - send to: John@TheStreetKid.com

About The Author

~ John Assaraf, aka The Street Kid
New York Times & Wall Street Journal Best-Selling Author, Trainer & Entrepreneur

http://www.TheStreetKid.com

john@thestreetkid.com

This week is Part Four of our five part series on The Season’s of Life.

In Part One of the series we discussed:

a) That life is about constant, predictable patterns of change.

b) For all of us, the only constant factor is our feelings and attitudes toward life.

c) We as human beings have the power of attitude and that attitude determines choice, and choice determines results.

In Part Two of our series we discussed:

a) Life and business are like the changing seasons.

b) You cannot change the seasons, but you can change yourself.

c) A major lesson in life to learn is how to handle the winters.

d) Winter time allows you to get stronger, wiser, better. The winters won’t change, but you can.

In Part Three of our series we discussed:

a) Spring is the season for entering the fertile fields of life with seed, knowledge, commitment, and a determined effort.

b) It is the promise of spring that as we sow, so shall we also reap, that for every disciplined human effort we will receive a multiple reward.

c) There are just a handful of springs that have been handed to each of us. Don’t just let the seasons pass by.

This week we will talk about the third major lesson in life to learn; how to nourish and protect your crops all summer. Sure enough, as soon as you’ve planted, the busy bugs and noxious weeds are out to take things over. Here is the next bit of truth: they will take it, unless you prevent it.

There are two key phrases to consider with the third major lesson. The first is “all good will be attacked.” Don’t press me for a reason. I was not in on some of the early decisions, so I don’t know why. I just know that it’s true. Let reality be your best beginning. Every garden will be invaded.

The second phrase is “all values must be defended.” Social values, political values, friendship values, business values - all must be defended. Every garden must be tended all summer. If you don’t develop this skill, you’ll never wind up with anything of value.

But for those who make diligent efforts to plant, protect, and preserve there are not enough birds, bugs, or other obstacles to destroy all the efforts of last spring.

(Next week we will talk about fall, the time of harvesting the fruits from our springtime labor.)

To Your Success,

Jim Rohn

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Are you prepared to make your heart matter? Are you prepared to feel whole, happy and healed of any heartache?

It does not surprise me our hearts are not whole (the root meaning of the word “heal”). We are taught throughout our unbalanced educational system to avoid our feeling centre. We avoid our true “knowing” in favour of the development of the rational mind.

We make the rational mind the font of all knowledge and we bury any real emotional understanding of our true selves. We prize what is partial over what is holistic. We accept the “ratio” as being more than the whole. Then we wonder why our life`s number doesn`t add up.

Healing your heart is to become whole.

It is to become a balanced human being. It is to leave the world of “forever doing and never enough” to return to simpler ways. This does not mean you have to change your material circumstances. It will mean in all likelihood a change of attitude. It will mean in all likelihood “a change of heart.”

We forget we are “feeling beings.”

We have become “doers with emotions.” Many of our emotions are blocked or out of control. Our feelings are no longer “free flowing.” They have become judgements frozen in our bodies. We are like icebergs with enough “bad feelings” lying below the surface of consciousness to sink the greatest relationship.

One great sorrow is we lose the best relationship available.

This is the feeling acceptance of ourselves as we are “warts and all.” Healing your heart does not mean you become a “good person.” Healing your heart does not mean you become a “nice person.” It more likely means you become “an allowing person.” You start by giving up judgement. You start to feel your feelings as they are without labels attached.

You allow yourself to “be more” and “do less.”

Much of our working, in my opinion, is a rational for avoiding “who we are.” Many of us are working extremely hard at “self-improvement” and “self development.” Much of us work as a way of avoiding the need “to go home.” This is the avoidance of the return to our “home place.” Our true home is where our hearts lie.

Your heart is your emotional centre.

Most of us are blocked at this feeling centre to some degree. Many of us are blocked to a major degree. We would prefer to feel diseased rather than at ease with allowing our hearts full expression. Rather than feel our heartache and our heartbreak we avoid it. Rather than allow it flow we block it and in doing so we repeat the pain.

Healing your heart is painful.

It is like the thawing of a frost bitten finger. You want to avoid the pain at any cost. However, avoiding your hearts pain also blocks the finer feelings of love and compassion. These are the feelings that will heal you and give your heart peace.

Journeying deeply into your heart is the story of the hero/ine. This is the story of “becoming whole.” It is a journey of the holy.

It is facing the dragons of doubt, despair, anger, hatred and guilt to name only a few. We all have them. They are roaming our emotional terrain. We have them caged. We defend ourselves against these “bad feelings.”

We do not like ourselves for having them.

We convince ourselves we can never be lovable for having such a Pandora’s box full of dross. We hope never to allow these secrets the light of day. We never get to realise the deeper understanding that “the gold is in the darkness.”

Healing your heart begins now.

Healing begins in every new moment. Healing begins by being aware of your mind and how you think. It begins with a commitment to “knowing” what you think. It works toward cessation of this so-called “thinking” so cherished as being rational. Healing works to giving you a sense of “peace of mind.” It works toward knowing the voice of the “trickster.” This is the voice that says you are not good enough. This is the inner voice most of us listen to each and every day

Your heart needs to be heard.

It is your real teacher. It is to be trusted and known. Its voice is more refined than the voice of the “trickster.” Our hearts voice knows our purpose. We have to be willing to go beyond all those gates of locked and loaded emotion. We are the prisoners of our own unprocessed feeling energy.

We can medicate against it and we do. This is the real “growth industry.” This way we can avoid feeling our pain but the cost will be heart damage. Eros will not be able to enter your heart. Arrows of passion will not pierce you. You will be alive but you will avoid living your life. As advised by a great Chinese Proverb, “the singing bird will not come.” There will be no song heard in your heart.

Healing your heart is the ultimate act of courage.

It is to live in this world with a heart open and free. It is to allow love and compassion to flow through you as an expression of your life force. This is who you really are. Your heart knows this when it is allowed to be whole. Your intellect cannot know this, as it cannot be more than a part. It cannot know the feeling of the “holy.”

In healing your heart you are not alone.

There is much healing energy in this world of apparent chaos. We have to be humble enough to ask to be given it. This is a first step alone the road of the heroic. Remember you are always enough. This is an experience you can know as a feeling moment to moment. Make a fullness of heart your focus. You “are worth it.”

Blessings upon you now and forever. Remember that the Blessing is already here and you are it.

Tony Cuckson is an Anam Cara. This Celtic term means “Soul Friend.” He specializes in providing insight for the spiritual journey, Blessings for YOU, words of wisdom and finding inner peace. Visitors to Irish Blessings Matter website and Tony’s Blog get the opportunity to develop a purpose driven life through articles, newsletters and other programs.

Get your free report called “7 ways to it’s a wonderful life” at http://www.irishblessingsmatter.com/, or go to Tony`s Blog at http://www.irishblessingsmatter.info/
where you will find links to information related to spiritual parenting, spiritual coaching and spirit in business.

I walked out of his office inspired. All I could immediately recall were those soft-spoken words, “STAY WITH IT”. They were from no less a person than Rev. Sam Adeyemi of Success Power fame, on whom I had gone to pay a courtesy call. The first time we met was two years earlier when he came to my campus to speak to students about success. Then I was an undergraduate with a fledging media outfit and, most naturally, the privilege fell on me to interview him for a story for my readers.

“How time flies”, he began. “Only two years ago you were a student. Now you’re out…on your own.” Thus began an almost 20-minute motivational talk that climaxed in his use of those encouraging words, “STAY WITH IT.” In his characteristic openness, he acknowledged how at the outset of his career he kept planting and uprooting his seedlings of efforts, all in a bid to find that “golden spot”.

But alas, in retrospect, such wandering activity only served to take him further and further away from his desired goals of real success, until he decided to focus. And today the results of his progress couldn’t be more obvious. But it all came when he decided to “stay with it”.

Ironically, those soft-spoken words have become marbled in my thoughts as they have continued to serve as a guide for me in my endeavours, especially against the background of that ever increasing tendency of vagrancy associated with one’s youthfulness. It has been my observation that this tendency is so strong in men that it requires a committed sense of discipline to adequately checkmate.

Look around you and you will see what I mean. The average young man today thinks that if he could only get a visa to leave our shores to Britain or the US, or if he could go to South Africa, Dubai, or almost anywhere but where he happens to be, he could succeed. But isn’t it amazing that all the time and energy invested in developing one’s self to this point becomes suddenly lost and wasted as he will need to start afresh? Why can’t we stay with it; right where we are with just what we have and give our efforts and resources the needed time to compound till we reach the threshold of victory?

Sydney Bremer Newton remarked that, “It is a sorry day for a young man who cannot see opportunities where he is, but thinks he can do better else where”. We need to understand that our future is at home with us, near at hand. I have seen people start particular businesses only to switch the next year to what they were told was “the next big thing” and then to another, and another all within five years. The result: nothing to show for all those years but wasted resources and time.

Were these people poor in ideas or incapable of making a great success of their endeavours? Certainly not! They simply lacked that sense of discipline and concentration. That’s why it’s so important when you start out on your peculiar success path, which you believe so strongly in, to close your ears. Because no sooner than you have begun, they’ll all come calling, telling you, “Hey, it’s happening the other way, come along.” And if you are not careful, you will leave the path you begun creating uncompleted, to join these beaten men in their beaten paths.

Don’t be “here” today and be found “there” tomorrow for many a bright young man have developed such a roving disposition, such a habit of going about, that they have ruined their rooting ability. They cannot stay on one spot- planting a tree today, pulling it up tomorrow and setting it out somewhere else the next day. The consequences of this wandering attitude are serious and give cause for worry. According to Dr. Orsen Marden, “this roving habit is dead to concentration. It ruins the ability to focus upon one thing; it destroys the aim; it develops the habit of discontent. It ruins continuity of purpose, so that there is no thread running through the life. It is fragmentary instead of being one continuous fabric.

“No life can be very successful which does not have a strong, steady, persistent purpose running through it. There must be an aim, and all the power must be applied to this aim to carry it out - broadening, deepening, widening and enlarging the life along the line of purpose. Fragmentary, piecemeal work never amounts to much.”

Only 2 years ago I was bombarded with numerous counsels to drop the publishing of my dream magazine, Achiever’s Manual for an “apparently more lucrative” Science text/Journal for senior secondary schools. My advisers, speaking probably from experience and observation, provided ample evidence of a mass market just awaiting the sickle. Additionally, my BSc Degree in the field was available to add credibility to the whole project. Besides, I also needed the money. Who doesn’t?
It was tempting though, but I remembered those words, “Stay with it.” They came to my rescue and I knew I had no other decision to make save that of continuing; that of staying the present course. I told my well-intentioned advisors, “Sorry, I’m here to stay.” In retrospect, I ask my self: What would have happened to the, then, over one year of efforts already sown and presently emerging as seedling if I had budged? It would have been all wasted. I feel better off today and it’s getting better by the day. Now I see the horizon gradually emerging.

I tell you, when you come to a point of full persuasion about your dreams and pursuits, staying with it becomes fun and second nature. Your miracle is ever at hand. So beware of not just selling out too soon but selling out at all in the first place. If only Ali Hafed, the wealthy farmer in “Acres Of Diamonds” had known, he would not have left his farm and family to journey to distant lands in search of diamonds. The man who bought his farm, together with one of the wise men of the East discovered “acres of diamonds” in the same farm.

Had Ali Hafed been content to remain at home, had he dug in his garden instead of going abroad in search of wealth, and reaping poverty, hardships, starvation and death, he would have been one of the richest men in the world, for the entire farm abounded in the richest of gems. Simply put; Had Ali Hafed STAYED WITH IT, he would have hit it BIG and turned out the better for it. This is one great lesson I have learned on this success journey. I tell you friends, I aint going nowhere. I’ve taken Sam Adeyemi’s words to “STAY WITH IT”.

You should too. So find out what your “IT” is and then STAY WITH IT!

Ubong Essien is a leading motivational speaking professional, success coach, author, creative consultant and TV personality in Lagos, Nigeria. He is also the publisher of the Achiever’s Manual, CEO of Inspiration Resources and author of 2 books - Dare to Dream and Succeed & The Gates’ Way to Riches. Email him at ubongessien@yahoo.com, or Visit him at http://www.mistermotivator.

There’s a great deal of nonsense talked about HDTV and much of the noise comes
from manufacturers’ and retailers’ advertising which in some cases is extremely
misleading.

One of the areas of greatest confusion is resolution. Resolution is defined as the
number of pixels - the elements which make up a digital image - in an image and is
usually quoted as a x b, where a is the number of pixels across the screen
(horizontal) and b is the number of pixels up and down (vertical, also referred to as
the number of lines). In this article we’ll explain everything you need to know about
the number of pixels required for HDTV.

HDTV Specification
The HDTV specification provides for three different types of HDTV, denoted by the
number of lines of resolution and the signal type. They are:

1080p (1080 lines, progressive scan)
1080i (1080 lines, interlaced)
720p (720 pixels, progressive)

Any TV not capable of displaying at least 720 lines is not ‘HDTV ready’ and any
signal with fewer than 720 lines is not an HDTV signal.

Interlaced or Progressive?
The ‘i’ and ‘p’ in the HDTV specification refer to interlaced and progressive scan. The
analog TV we’ve been watching for years is interlaced. That simply means that each
frame of video (of which there are 30 per second in NTSC and 24 per second in PAL)
is split into two fields. Each field contains alternate lines of the signal (one has the
odd, the other the even) and is displayed for 1/60th of a second (1/48th for PAL).
Because it happens so fast, your brain interprets each frame as a single image.
Progressive scan signals have no fields, they simply display each frame in its
entirety for 1/30th (or 1/24th) of a second. This results in a higher quality image,
particularly noticeable in fast-action broadcasts such as sporting events.

So every TV that can display 720 lines is HDTV ready?
No, and this is one of the key areas of confusion. The other important element of
the HDTV specification is that signals must be broadcast in 16:9 widescreen. This is
known as the aspect ratio, where ‘16′ refers to the width of the image and ‘9′ to the
height. In other words, the height of the picture is 9/16ths of the width.
Some manufacturers promote TVs with a maximum resolution of 1024 x 768 pixels
as HDTV ready. This is incorrect. Although the total number of vertical pixels is
greater than the 720 minimum necessary for HDTV, at an aspect ratio of 16:9 it
would need 1280 pixels horizontally to display a 720-line HDTV picture. The only
solution is to either squash or crop the picture, neither of which is satisfactory.
So, in order to be properly HDTV capable, a TV needs to be able to display at least
1280 pixels horizontally as well as at least 720 vertically.

Remember before you buy to check that the resolution of your HDTV is at least
1280 x 720 pixels and don’t rely on the logo on the box.

Kenny Hemphill is the editor and publisher of The HDTV Tuner. Visit him at http://www.the-hdtv-
tuner.com and discover why HDTV is the most exciting thing to happen to
television since the advent of color TV. Better still, keep up to date with the latest
developments in HDTV and high definition DVD by subscribing to the news feed. Click
the link for details.